The 90-10 Magic Formula…

I guess I am again in my gyan mode today.

I work for an organization where the average age is to the south of 30 years (I skew the average in the wrong direction though). Every day I witness young 20-something folks (and often much older and much more experienced colleagues!!) cursing and complaining about their manager being rude to them, inadequate compensation hike, getting a "ding" at the recent promotion interview, general work environment, delayed cabs, traffic on the road, etc. I can see people generally getting stressed about everything around them. Though I don’t consider myself a “monk” who is at total peace with himself (I am sometimes grumpy, and have bouts of anger once in a while; ask my close friends and wife about it), I think I am generally happy about life and work if I compare myself with the majority of people around me (I am confident my colleagues at work can vouch for that). One mantra that has helped me bring more sanity to my life is the 90/10 principle. Though I read about it only recently, I have believed in the concept for several years now.

The principle is simple – 10% of life is made up of what happens to you, 90% of life is decided by how you react.

Let me double-click on it. People have no control over the 10% of what happens to them. We can not stop the manager from having a bad day at work (and therefore becoming his punching bag), the cab guy starting out late, it being really hot outside (therefore the air-conditioning not being effective). We have no control over this 10%.

The other 90% is different. We determine that by our reaction. Do we get upset about the cab guy not showing up at work and then due to frustration pick a meaningless argument with a cab-mate on the way. And therefore come to work with the grumpy face, and generally feeling bad about everything. Do we get upset about sloppy air conditioning, and say something silly (that we may repent later) to the administration person in the office, that gets reported to the office head. We can not control red light, traffic on the road, rising mercury, but we can certainly control our reaction.

Though I know the principle seems fairly crazy, and straight out of some third-rate self help book, it has really helped me. One ground rule that I often keep at the back of my head is “responding and not reacting to situations, and evaluating if the situation falls in the 10% category or the 90% category.”

I have seen this principle being adopted (in some form or fashion) by various spiritual groups (such as the Art of Living; which prescribes that people should smile in every situation, and react with a calm mind), management leaders (several self-help books prescribe a quick root-cause analysis of situation to evaluate if that merits your energy), and gurus (who advise that people count up to ten, think about the problem, and then react accordingly).

For the current generation however I think the mathematical version works the best – we should be on a lookout for those “10% situations” before stressing out and letting someone or something ruin our day.